Skipping Steps

In this face paced world, it is quite easy to forget all the work required in accomplishing just about anything. Almost all of us have constant access to information, videos, audio on the Internet. We have seen incredible advances in medicine, communication, travel, and living conditions. Yet we complain about how horrible life is. We can pick up a telephone at any moment and call just about anyone in the world (that's a choice of over 6 billion people), we can get on the Internet and chat with our friends on Facebook or through instant messaging, we can drive or ride public transit to just about anywhere in the country for a very small cost (compared to what it was 100 years ago), and yet so many of us are lonely. How does this happen? When we have so much opportunity in front of us, how can we languish?

In our rush to be happier, we often forget steps in between the start and the completion of our goals. We think that we can somehow just pack everything in and somehow make things work with very little attention. Did you know that children who skip the crawling stage often end up with dyslexia? I've had discussion with quite a few therapists who've told me that they have encouraged dyslexic students to crawl and this helps with their disability. I was actually one of those children who just stood up and walked with no crawling, and had reading problems early on. Some other examples of us skipping steps:

• Potential clients approach me all the time, saying they want a website done. They have this great idea that will make millions of dollars yet they've given very little thought to the specifics of what needs to be done (or even how it will actually make them money). What's even worse is those who want to micro-manage but do not pay attention to the details. They expect to give some vague parameters and magically have a website appear.

• Politicians. I wish that's all that I had to say, but I think that we're all used to skipping steps that we don't even notice it any more. We hear the great (or not-so-great) speeches they give, see them do a couple of good things, and then expect them to magically make our lives better with very little or no action from us. They tell us how much our lives will improve if they are put into power and if we allow them to pass the laws that they want, and we rarely look into the specifics of what is being done. Most of the time even they don't read the damn bills. How does this help us, really?

• When you go see a concert or download a song from the Internet, you listen to the music for a few minutes and you think "what a nice song". If you are like half of my friends, you complain about the "high price" that you pay for such things without realizing all of the work that goes into making these songs. I've spent up to 13 hours per minute on songs. Sometimes I can finish composing a five minute song in one day (roughly 6 to 10 hours). Sometimes I labor on it off and on for months. I hate recording, it can take just as long or longer than composing the blasted song unless I've already composed it in synthesis. Orchestra members often collectively practiced hundreds of thousands of hours to hone their skills. Yet all we see is a few minutes of song and we complain about how we're being cheated by having to pay for it.

In our rush to make our lives better, it is my experience that we make our lives worse. By constantly pining for the things that we don't have we forget about the many wonderful things that we have available to us right now. Somehow we think we can rig the system to automatically give us something that we want. Actions and consequences have no sort of correlation in our minds. We see all the wonderful things happening to those around us without seeing the costs that they've already paid in time, assets, and sweat and demand the same things with no cost. It doesn't make any sense, yet still we make the demands.

• We want good health, but we are not willing to even do the research into the way our bodies work so that we can better understand how to be healthy. Even then, many of us are not willing to make the uncomfortable lifestyle choices that will make us healthier.

• We want to be rich, but we do not understand the way the monetary system works or any of the laws regarding it. We don't want to make investments for fear of losing what we already have and we want other people to take care of us (through the so-called security of a "job").

• We want to be well-liked and accepted, yet we do not want to invest in others for fear of being rejected or ridiculed. We do not want to do the work of planning things that others might like to do, we do not want to work in actually implementing these activities. It is little wonder that so many of us are lonely.

We can't just shove off responsibility to "experts" to do what we want them to. Don't get me wrong, I think it absolutely essential to get advice from people who are more knowledgeable then ourselves - but at the same time you cannot expect others to magically give you what you want. There are certain things that only you can do for yourself. If you are not willing to make the decisions, what often happens is that others make those decisions for you. If someone else is making the decisions, you are going to get what they want - which may or not be the same thing that you want. In my experience (on both the giving and receiving ends), it's not.

It can be really frustrating living in a world of instant gratification. If one is depressed or not feeling well, people around him tell him to suck it up, get up, and perform. We forget that not only do we need to do well, we need to be well. We can't just skip to the end. There are a lot of little details that need attention if we are to accomplish anything. There are no shortcuts, but it is amazing how much we do that gets in the way of what we want believe we want. The internal road blocks are much more destructive than the external ones. Remove the internal road blocks, and it won't be long before you have some short-sighted person complaining about how easy your life is. Hopefully you'll be in a position to where you can calmly and lovingly explain how they too can make progress like you have.

Must see: Everything's Amazing & Nobody's Happy (video)

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Michael

Great post! It is too easy to let things slide sometimes, and not take the necessary steps, just to get it done. I like how you hit the idea that most people don't understand what goes into making things, like sites or songs. Great job.